kazatasupa: (burney mountain)
As soon as I shut the door I knew that I had left my keys inside the apartment... I don't know when Jared will get home and I guess it doesn't really matter. I've got Thelonious Monk on the head phones and everything is settling so well.

Dr. Keller gave me three copies of David Rothenberg's new book this afternoon... one for me, one for Jared and I'm going to offer the other copy to Will Taylor. The book is a gift, given on the condition that I read it and participate in a group discussion April 3 (which will be led by Rothenberg). Biloba... get a copy, if you have time to read.

I have my copy, and opened it for the first time as I sat outside Juice and Java and watched the sun set over western skys, pulling a plethora (my new favorite word) of colors down as time went to sleep - over the hill and far away. I skimmed through the first couple of pages and was caught brilliantly by a passage:

"There is no preparation for the improvising life besides learning glimmers of the background rules and not being afraid to bend them to fit the changing situation. I would not say push and pull the rules a bit so as to stay in the game that continually evolves. No, this is not a plea for moderation. The interesting life is not always a balanced life. Take risks for their sake alone." - David Rothenberg, 'Sudden Music'

All this time, I have been looking for balance and bored with it... somewhere along the line I lost my abilitiy to improvise, to play music with my life... to be an artist, not with a canvas, but with my life.

I've always endeavored to live my life as such, but somehow forgot... became lost, but now I'm found. I'm here!!! Right here.

Another note/realization - mmmm.. no, that's too private. Ah hah hah ha... ahhh.

kazatasupa: (burney mountain)
Yes, a cup of coffee would be nice.

It's trying to snow... the mountains are getting a nice storm, I'm sure.... hell, everyone else on this planet is probably more aware of Utah's weather than I am and I'm looking out the window at a storm that keeps rolling over the valley, but dropping very little snow. Provo/Orem gets the least amount of snow along the Wasatch front. Salt Lake City gets the most (I think) due to the lake effect snow phenomenon.

L. and I are going to SLC this evening... even though the opening ceremony has already begun... or will shortly, we hope to catch the last bit (from outside the stadium). I'm sure security will give me a look-over... My beard was enough reason for the security people to pull me aside in the San Francisco International Airport for a search... took my stinky boots off... felt me up and down... sort of embarrassing, really.

"Everybody search the pacifist... He's big and scary and has a huge goatee..."


My sore throat/fever has turned to a slight cough. I hate being sick.

L. accompanied me to a valentine dinner last night, which was sponsored by the philosophy club. So, what is love? Blah, blah, blah...

I love being with her... only, I wish we had been somewhere else. The company was good. Biloba was there as was bouteloua. David Keller, his wife, Karen Mizell, Lee Mortenson, Lara Hamblin and another woman were at our table. I really enjoy the company of all those people, but was not in the mood to talk about philosophy... or even anything very smart at all. I wanted to be silly, and maybe drink a bit... but, I have this strange "dumb jock" complex around smart people... Stupid. So, I sat there silently, talking little while holding L.'s hand. Lee asked if we were together... L. laughed, and I said sheepishly, "sometimes..."

I wish I could have said, "yes, we are... and I am so, very happy."

I actually wore slacks, a nice shirt and a sports coat to the gig... Very not me, but fun nevertheless. L. looked... well... so, so nice. I never dress up... ever. The last time I wore the sports coat was to my Uncle's funeral in December of '99. Before that? I have no idea. But, I had fun... and am willing to dress up again (but only if Ryn wants me to).

Tomorrow night: theater followed by an evening in the bar (that is if the place doesn't sell out before we get there). It's been a while since I've been dancing, dancing, dancing!
kazatasupa: (burney mountain)
"Fatal Error"

This is the message Hewlett Packard's software was giving me at eight this morning. So, I re-booted my computer and was able to scan in one document. Next document, "Fatal Error." Again, Re-boot. Try to scan again and the software recommends that I uninstall the program and reinstall the software. Fine. I uninstall the program, go up to the tech office where there are no tech people... then I remember that I had Ted look for the user's manual once, and he had no idea where he had filed it, or the software. I rummage through file after file, then find a manual for a Hewlett Packard scanner. I go back to my desk, log onto hp's web site, find the printer and the software and download it...

Only to find that the manual was for a different scanner and the program that I had downloaded was in Spanish.

A little swearing followed by another uninstall.

I went upstairs again to look for tech people. No one in, no computers on... what good are people if they don't come to work?

So, I go back to HP's web site, but I don't know what kind of scanner I have (you would think they would print the damn name somewhere on the device). After an hour of searching I find a search engine that asks for "product numbers." Luckily, the first number I find on the scanner, is the correct number. HP ScanJet 6200. I follow a couple of links and find the program I am looking for. It takes 20 minutes to download...

I take a quick break, while Joc is here, to get a sandwich. I run into Jared in the hall way. He reminds me of a meeting we have with Dr. Keller concerning the Environmental Ethics Conference. "Can't Go, Jared..." I have too much work to do.

So, he's pissed off at me.

Get back to my desk, eat my sandwich and wait for the damn program to finish downloading. Once finished, I unzip the file and run the install. Right program, but it doesn't scan from the automatic document feeder. So, I go back to HP's web site to look for software for the feeder. The feeder doesn't have software.

I look at the scanner and notice that the feeder is unplugged from the scanner. Dumb shit. I plug it back in, and the damn thing works...

5 hours wasted. Now, to work!

I hate my job.
kazatasupa: (burney mountain)
Ugh.. tried to work on my web page. Just not motivated enough. I'm downloading Macromedia Flash 5 and Freehand 10 instead and watching people as they study. I need to write Dr. Keller an e-mail and apologize for being such a lousy student.

Damn me!
kazatasupa: (burney mountain)
Bad Semester.

UVSC doesn't want to pay me more for my services. The cost of living is terribly high...

I'm burned out with school (no secret) and am prepaired to suffer the consiquences. I have a final today, at which time I am supposed to turn in a semester journal as well as a project. Ha ha ha ha...

Dr. Keller has been incredibly patient with my papers this semester. However, they're due tomorrow... and I haven't written a damn thing.

I'm a poor student. This semester is a write-off. I want to change things around a bit... I may study business next... plans on opening a coffee shop in the works.

Small business. The idea scares the shit out of me. But, it's what I want to do.
kazatasupa: (burney mountain)
Tuesday Morning...
I was up at six twenty. That's record-like early. This time change has changed me (at least for the last couple of days) for the better. I like getting up before everyone else. Unfortunately, my roommate is getting up about the same time now, as opposed to his usual 10 or 11 (or, whenever he wakes up - I'm usually at work, so I don't really know). So much for quiet mornings to myself. I think I'll try a six o'clock wake-up tomorrow... maybe even five thirty. I need to stop at the shop and pick some beans up for a home-brew.
Nothing much on my mind at this hour. Still sipping my first cup o' joe. I had to audit a class yesterday (last day to drop or audit). I should have known that I wouldn't follow through on a self-paced internet algebra class. I didn't even start. God, I'm a slacker. And, for those of you who are interested, I did not audit Keller's Ancient and Medieval Philosophy class. There. Are you happy?


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