Apr. 2nd, 2002

kazatasupa: (fatherson)
What are you thinking about?

Still you.

Sometimes, I still believe that I'm the smartest person in the world. Then, after six beers I find myself walking home from Jason's house with my coat on inside out. Fuck. I like Rothenberg's metaphor of combining genres of music and learning to improvise by your own rules.

I'm trying to find my voice within the rules set by your lead. It is difficult for me, a song like I've never played. Your chord changes and scales are foreign and, at times, I find myself extremely depressed by my lack of movement within the walls set before me. I feel closed in, and helpless and am grasping for the best way to play my song.

And, still you set the pace, playing comfortably at ease with a dignified rhythm and glowing confidence in the path now set. I grow increasingly uncomfortable with the notes I choose... feeling out of place, like an asshole with no invite who chooses to crash the party anyway.

A blind-man reading brail for the first time.

I wish to play the blues at a crossroads, while you play hymns to the heavens. And, I find myself falling further into the abyss...

There is a note on my bedroom door that says:
Pay Attention
Play!

I'm watching you, and careful of the steps I take. I want to play beautiful music, even if I am not writing the song. I keep looking for the space in which I can let my voice be heard, but am careful to not crowd the other instruments. This is, after all, your song... not mine.

If you listen carefully, you will hear an eternity of suffering in my improvisation. Even, if the song is about triumph.

And, this is a song that I will grow to love.

What are you thinking about?

Late night, on my laptop...

Still, you.
kazatasupa: (fatherson)
Rgggg....

Out of coffee again!!! Why does this happen to me every single freaking day?

Having Fun

Apr. 2nd, 2002 09:50 am
kazatasupa: (fatherson)
I sent a message out to all the student computers that said:

Public viewing of PORNOGRAPHY is illegal in the state of Utah and against UVSC computer use policy. Violations will be reported to campus police.

Then, I sit and wait for the replies. One student:

From: Student1.STU.UVSC[94] i didn't view any pornography ... i'm not into that...i saw the note that said free nudes, and i chose not to go into it...look at the pictures i did look at, and you will see that i am telling the truth. i promise!!!!!

From:.Student1.STU.UVSC[94] did you get my message? please reply back. i promise that i did not look at any pornography. i promise

From: .Student1.STU.UVSC[94] hello? will you please reply?

From: .Student1.STU.UVSC[94] hello? will you please reply? i honestly do not think that i did anything wrong, but if the things that i did view are considered pornography, then now i know

From:.Me: You're Okay.

From: .Student1.STU.UVSC[94] seriously, thank you so much...you really had me worried...however, i guess i will not even get anywhere close in the future...sorry!!!

Profile

kazatasupa: (Default)
kazatasupa

December 2021

S M T W T F S
   1234
567891011
12131415161718
19202122232425
262728 293031 

Most Popular Tags

Style Credit

Expand Cut Tags

No cut tags
Page generated Jul. 17th, 2025 02:54 am
Powered by Dreamwidth Studios