kazatasupa: (burney mountain)
kazatasupa ([personal profile] kazatasupa) wrote2002-03-18 08:36 am

Monday Morning Blues

I think I had a cinnamon roll yesterday. I can't remember eating anything else... I drank a lot of coffee. I walked all over town, listening to Norah Jones. I drove in circles. I cried all day (off and on). I left many people with the impression that I had cracked.

I was looking for signs.

One of my many stops at the coffee shop found Biloba reading my horoscope from the city weekly. Taurus:

Before going to sleep last night, I asked my subconscious mind to send me a dream with a useful symbolic message for you Tauruses. Near morning, I dreamed of caterpillars slowly but surely devouring the big bad wolf. When they were finished, the spun cocoons. After a while they emerged as giant yellow butterflies with the shape of bulls on their wings. Here's my dream interpretation: I believe you Tauruses are entering a phase when a young or "larval" part of your psyche will nibble a problem to death, setting the stage for a rebirth in which the problem will be transformed into a beautiful thing.

I hope so. I'm tired of hurting...

I need to find food... I haven't eaten yet today. Between Saturday's dinner at the Bombay House and this morning, I have lost 7 pounds. I'm just not hungry. My stomach is in knots...

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